square one, my slate is clear.

It's really something I need to do. It's not for anyone else except for myself.
I'm starting new. I'm going to forget about everything negative that has been going on in my life and just start new as much as I can.
I'm really good about dwelling on the past and letting it become who I am. Whether it's a death in the family, a friendship gone bad, a bad day, irritating family members, et cetera. I just keep letting things that shouldn't matter to me upset me.
It's even stuff as minuscule as someone posting something on instagram that I don't agree with or someone having a sticker in the back window of their car or just hearing about someone and getting heated over the things that I hear without going to the source about it. These things don't affect me, or better, I shouldn't be letting them affect me. But I still do. I let them negatively affect me and that is why I want to change.
Granted, I have changed a lot since the 2009-2011 era. I let an ex influence me to be something that I never use to be. I can't really blame him, because I let him influence me. At the time, I guess I just didn't want to disappoint anyone. Even if that meant that my happiness was never going to be a factor. I just think I have a little bit more of mental changing to do before I am content.
So that's what I'm going to do. I'm starting new.
No more grudges, no more getting heated over stuff that doesn't apply to me, no more dwelling.
One of the first steps I think I should take is limit my social media time.
Another step I'm going to take is stop worrying about what other people are doing so much unless it pertains to me.
I'm going to start letting go of things as well as I can.
I'm going to forget the grudges.
I'm going to let go of the past.

I think this will help me be who I want to be.
This post is really all over the place, but I was just trying these thoughts down.
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